Fraternity: A Celebration of Charlie & Liam
by LostInLost18
Summary: Drabbles about Charlie and Liam: Chapter 6 - "His future is now littered with lingering whispers of regret..." Liam mourns over Charlie months after the Oceanic 6 get back.
1. And It's Always You and Me, Always

Fraternity: 

A Celebration of Charlie & Liam 

_#1_

_And It's Always You and Me, Always and Forever_

You and Me - The Wannadies

They share a code no one else can crack.

Sometimes it's just a look when they've been caught being mischievous, a look which signals to the other to run like the wind. Sometimes they'll come up with a code word for danger, and change it each time so it becomes harder to spot. And sometimes it's just their facial expressions - a simple gesture as a wink can signal anything, from revealing the completion of a prank, to a silent confession, to a sign of affection.

One thing, however, that never needs coding, which never needs to be hidden because it's too embarrassing or too crude, is that they'll always be there for each other.

It's a symbol of honour, in fact.

And that symbol becomes even more valuable, even more important to hold on to when the eldest brother hears on national television that his baby brother's plane has disappeared.


	2. I Wish You Were A Strange I'd Disengage

_#2_

_I wish you were a stranger I could disengage  
_Over My Head - The Fray

He hears the door being flung open, followed by the slow shuffle of footsteps along the carpet and a series of heavy of sighs.

It's how he's able to tell his brother is stoned.

He watches as his wreck of a brother comes staggering in, pausing only to confirm to himself that he is in the right place, before flinging his body onto the couch, muttering a slurred greeting in his direction, and then promptly passing out.

He sighs heavily and wishes he didn't have this tie, this connection, to his brother. Not because he's particularly ashamed of his brother - although, at this precise moment he can't really say that he isn't- but because it would be easier to just walk away from this, pretend this isn't his problem too.

But it is.

And day by day, he's being pulled down by his brother's own misgivings. And he knows one day he'll snap.

They're living on broken time now.


	3. I Am On My Way, I Can Go the Distance

_#3_

_I am on my way, I can go the distance_

It's all about the music.

That's what he tells himself as they fumble through forming the band which, they are sure, will rocket them into fame and glory. That's not what it's about for him, the fame, but he knows recognition will surely help them not hinder them.

He chooses to ignore the drugs he sees his brother stash in his pocket, the various rehearsal calamities they suffer, the fact they go through drummers like he goes through guitar picks, because it all has to be worth it. All the pain and frustration surely has to build up to something greater?

And when the first spotlight hits him, at their first mediocre gig, and the first instrument starts to play, he starts to come alive. He starts to see it for what it is – an experience, a weird sort of high, an unsurpassable thrill.

He shares a look with his brother and they both feel it. They both know they are unstoppable now, that they can go the distance and become rock stars, _legends,_ like Oasis, like The Beatles.

And, despite it all, he is glad he is sharing this moment with his brother, the only family he has left, and the closest thing to a best friend he'll ever have.

**A/n: Ok, this is more about Charlie than anything else but it just came to me and I needed to write it down. Thanks Jimelda for reviewing! Glad you like the drabbles I've done so far. **


	4. I Know Sometimes You'll Need Me

_#4_

_I know sometimes you'll need me, and I got your back  
_Ginuwine - The Best Man I Can Be

He combs the streets looking for him, his frantic eyes trying to search for a small, blonde haired boy of twelve. It's not easy; in Manchester, the number of backstreets and alleyways near their house outnumber the number of fingers on his hands. He probably only knows about three of them off the top of his head.

In the end, it doesn't really take a lot of digging to find him,

He approaches the alley behind the cemetery and spots a hunched up figure, whose head is buried in between his knees, and hears the loud, gasping sobs being emitted from him. The mop of blondish brown hair is the big giveaway.

He doesn't know what to say, what to do, because how can you tell someone it'll be ok when you don't know that it will be? Their mother's gone - he knows that his brother is really broken about this, and words aren't enough this time.

He inches his away along the alley and then sits down next to him, just as a physical sign of support, if nothing else.

At first, he doesn't think his brother has noticed his appearance, because the sobs don't seem to show any sign of slowing, and his small, skinny frame is shaking uncontrollably. He's never seen him this broken before - it almost scares him.

Then, out of nowhere, a hand darts out and grabs his, squeezing it tight. Normally, he would've been uncomfortable with the gesture, would've mocked him for acting like such a sissy girl, but he knows it's not the moment.

Checking to make sure no one is watching, he squeezes the hand back, silently telling him things would be ok and that he had his back.

He knows he's all he has left in this world.

No matter the occasion, or the mood, he knows moments like this will bond them together forever.


	5. For Christmas, This Is All I'm Askin For

_#5_

_(For Christmas) This is all I'm asking for. _

All I Want For Christmas - Mariah Carey

They stare at a slowly dying fire; the last specks of heat, and life, cough their way towards the two boys, one of whom is wiser in years, but not in heart. The faint glow of the dying fire lights up their gloomy expressions, _(though they wish the darkness would hide them)._

"They fighting again?" he asks, even though he knows the answer.

The youngest boy nods slowly, tears filling his eyes. It's a ritual, now, to have every Christmas start and end with their parents fighting. They can hear the faint yells from upstairs, followed by the sound of the odd door slamming.

"I got you something, Li," the youngest speaks up.

A grubby package, crudely wrapped, is pushed into his hands.

He looks at it; the gift seems foreign to him; not unwelcome, just strange.

"I, er, didn't get -"

He feels uncomfortable, guilty as hell, even, knowing the only presents he got were the obligatory ones for their parents.

"It's okay, Li. Just open it," his younger brother commands.

Smiling cautiously, he unpeels the paper with baited breath, caught in a brief frenzy of excitement, the season's infectious sense of joy surrounding him. A necklace falls out into his palms and, for a moment, the feeling is sucked out of the room. _(What does he want with a sodding necklace?) _He feels recklessly disappointed.

But he sees the patient look on his brother's face, and notices the crest on the necklace itself _(the family crest, no less) _and knows he must've gone to a lot of time and effort to get this for him. He swallows his emotion and smiles through watery eyes.

"Merry Christmas, baby bro. Thank you for this."

His brother beams back, which is the best present of all. _(He's not seen him smile in a long, long time.)_

"Merry Christmas, Li."


	6. I'm A Little Drunk, And I Need You Now

# 6

_It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now_

Need You Now – Lady Antebellum

He can't see the time, but he knows it's late. There are numerous empty bottles of beer on the table, and he himself is sprawled out along the couch, staring at the ceiling. Karen has taken Meg to her parent's house for the weekend, leaving him free to peruse the television at leisure. He made the mistake of switching over to a channel covering the tale of the fallen Oceanic survivors… and he hasn't stopped drinking since.

It'd obviously been authorized by the survivors themselves, because the ones who came home were on the documentary, telling tales about the fallen survivors. He'd been so tempted to switch off when they got round to covering Charlie only he didn't. Because there'd been a part of him eager to find out how his brother had been seen, how he'd acted during his final days. And the whole thing had ended up being worse than he could've imagined. A brunette woman with haunted eyes _(eyes filled with such pain; longing)_ hails him as a hero, a kind hearted, brave soul she was proud to call a friend.

Somehow, it's worse hearing him praised than hearing him slated. It confirms the fact that he hardly knew his brother towards the end. Heroic is a side he has never seen to Charlie and that revelation immediately made him switch to the vodka. Karen has tried talking to him, calming him down from afar, but he can't process her kind words of encouragement.

He's spiralled down into the state where he's drunk dialled his brother several times, like a teenage boy after a break up, half expecting him to answer. All he gets is his voicemail, yet it manages to raise a smile on his weary face.

_"Hey, this is Charlie. Leave a message and I'll get back to you."_

What makes him smile is that he can hear the strums of a guitar in the background. It's stupid how silly little details like that still matter. What's even stranger is he can pick out what song Charlie's playing in the background, and he unconscientiously hums it in between gulps of alcohol.

The end of the documentary is what tips him over the edge. It is just a montage of pictures of the deceased set to John Lennon's _Imagine._ Not only had it been his and Charlie's favourite song – aside from _Wonderwall_ – but because just looking at the range of photos reminds him that the grief he's feeling is just a grain of sand in a huge hourglass. There are other stories like his; families of those lost in the crash who never got to say sorry, never got to say goodbye, forever haunted by those final scenes before the person they loved was pulled away from them forever.

His future is now littered with lingering whispers of regret; there will always be a Charlie in his mind he never got to know, never got to understand. And, thanks to that stupid plane, he never will.


End file.
